Latest Snow White flick disappoints

Mirror Mirror

Mirror Mirror on the wall, this isn’t funny after all…

So we all know the story of Snow White and so we can’t be surprised that there will be departures from the original story-line.

However, this cheesy rendition is a big disappointment.

From making the dwarves into thieves, drunks and vagabonds to trying to make Julie Roberts into the evil queen, this show leaves us underwhelmed on many levels.

The only bright spot in an otherwise lackluster couple of hours is Nathan Lane as the “do your bidding” Brighton.

I have to say here that Nathan Lane is one of my all-time favourites, so I am a bit biased but this bumbling servant gave me all the laughs that this show had.

The best line comes as Brighton (Lane) emerges from the evil Queen’s spell in which she changed him into a cockroach, he announces that it was truly a nightmare and that a grasshopper had had his way with him…well, come on, it was the funniest line really.

The little people are no Sleepy, Doc and Grumpy, and don’t capture our hearts, that’s for sure and are actually a big disappointment.

But if you do spend the money and see it, wait for the final credits which will give you a clue to the future of these ‘ner-do-well little folks.

Lily Collins as Snow White is also lackluster and stiff, in fact it’s as if each of the actors are just playing a role and not interacting at all with each other..the cast just does not gel here.

Julia Roberts actually pulled at least one muscle as the costumes were so heavy (costumes were big and bright), likely the only bright thing in the film.

So I feel so badly that there are not redeeming qualities in Mirror Mirror that I am going to give you a few little known facts about mirrors, just so this column has not been a complete waste of time.

Fact 1: A long time ago mirrors were only polished sheets of metal – silver and copper were the most common

Fact 2: The coating of a mirror is generally silica which increases reflectivity (riveting fact, eh?)

Fact 4: In Feng Shui, mirrors are used to bring harmony into the home

Fact 5: To undo the seven years of bad luck that apparently occurs when you break a mirror, you must take the shards of that mirror and bury it in soil under the light of a full moon.

Bad luck would be the least of your worries if anyone actually sees you burying the shards of mirror, making sure you’re not put in a loony bin, would likely be the biggest worry

I was so looking forward to this show, and it did not entertain. So two  reels and the hope that Snow White, has found her prince and a spa which will wash her eyebrows.

Susan Steen is a local non-profit executive and movie buff.


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