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Letter: An ode to the White House from Kelowna

Gotta Serve Somebody 2.0
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To the editor:

On October 9 the White House announced Nikki Haley would be leaving her post as U.S. ambassador to the United Nations. A line from Bob Dylan’s Grammy-winning song Gotta Serve Somebody came immediately to mind: “You may be an ambassador to England or France.”

In this age of Trump, I hope “Zimmy” will be pleased with this rewrite. (In the interest of space, the chorus appears once.)

You may be US ambassador to the UN

You may like to ramble, might watch CNN

You may be a judge who’s had too many beers

You may be a senator for thirty-eight years

You might be on Broadway, dancing on the stage

You might work at the border and put kids in a cage

You may be a businessman or like to eat roast beef

They may call you Donald or some high-degree chief

You may be a great singer, you might be a young clerk

You may be a host on the Fox News Network

You may be rich or poor, you may be short or tall

You may be living in another country that is ready to fall

You may be a domestic worker working in a home

You may be working in a white house or you might work in a dome

You might bake buns or you might even do pranks

You might be a corporate overlord, you might even own banks

You may be a preacher with your spiritual pride

You may be a smilin’ politician taking bribes on the side

You may be workin’ in a barbershop, know how to comb Donald’s hair

You may know all about fitness, may know how to breathe air

Might like to wear spandex, might like to wear wool

Might like to drink water, might like to drink Red Bull

You might like to eat white truffles, you might like to eat bread

You may be sleeping in an alley, sleeping in a queen-sized bed

You may call him Captain Chaos, you may call him Trumplethinskin

You may call him Adolph Twitler, you may call him Puppet of Putin

You may call him Narcissus, you may call him Von Clownstick

You may call him Agent Orange, but no matter what name you pick

Chorus:

You’re gonna have to serve somebody, yes indeed

You’re gonna have to serve somebody

Well, it may be the devil or it may be the lord

But you’re gonna have to serve somebody

David Buckna

Kelowna